I agree with Kimberley. Who or what are your sources?
For you to be taken seriously by serious people, you need to brush up on your writing. This is free advice from an experienced subeditor:
1. Make very sure to spell names correctly, for instance Wernher von Braun, not Warner Von Braun. A mistake like this undermines the credibility of your writing.
2. If you put text between quotation marks, you need to credit the source.
3. You have quite a few paragraphs with quotation marks at the beginning, but no closing quotation marks. So where does the quotation end?
4. If you quote more than one paragraph underneath each other, every paragraph starts with a quotation mark and stays open. Put the end quotation mark at the end of the whole lot.
5. Quotes inside quotes should be single. If you use single quotes for paragraphs, inside quotes should be double.
6. 5,000 not 5, 000. (Or 5 000 in metric terms.)
7. Your article should be shortened to at least half its length – there are a lot of repetitions. Remember, people get dozens of substacks a day. All your articles are much, much too long.
8. Research is step number 1, writing step number 2. Then follow the most important steps of writing: read through your work several times, cut and shorten, rewrite to be more clear, check names and facts, check punctuation, polish and polish.
9. At the end of your article, list all your sources. Google how to do it professionally.
10. You could have mentioned books and memoirs written by victims/survivors of MK Ultra, and where to find them.
I hope you accept my comments not as criticism but as encouragement. The better you write, the more we can share it with our friends and the rest of the world. I am one of your faithful readers and grateful that you dedicate a big part of your life to shine a light on the darkness in this world.
Thank you so much for taking the time to share such detailed and constructive feedback. I truly appreciate the guidance, and I will be sure to implement these improvements in my future work.
In the seventies I remember how the biker gangs would recruit young girls. Love bomb them, then proceeded right to trauma bonding them. In no time these girls would do anything. Tattoo themselves with property of so and so. These girls were proud of their servitude.
I agree with Kimberley. Who or what are your sources?
For you to be taken seriously by serious people, you need to brush up on your writing. This is free advice from an experienced subeditor:
1. Make very sure to spell names correctly, for instance Wernher von Braun, not Warner Von Braun. A mistake like this undermines the credibility of your writing.
2. If you put text between quotation marks, you need to credit the source.
3. You have quite a few paragraphs with quotation marks at the beginning, but no closing quotation marks. So where does the quotation end?
4. If you quote more than one paragraph underneath each other, every paragraph starts with a quotation mark and stays open. Put the end quotation mark at the end of the whole lot.
5. Quotes inside quotes should be single. If you use single quotes for paragraphs, inside quotes should be double.
6. 5,000 not 5, 000. (Or 5 000 in metric terms.)
7. Your article should be shortened to at least half its length – there are a lot of repetitions. Remember, people get dozens of substacks a day. All your articles are much, much too long.
8. Research is step number 1, writing step number 2. Then follow the most important steps of writing: read through your work several times, cut and shorten, rewrite to be more clear, check names and facts, check punctuation, polish and polish.
9. At the end of your article, list all your sources. Google how to do it professionally.
10. You could have mentioned books and memoirs written by victims/survivors of MK Ultra, and where to find them.
I hope you accept my comments not as criticism but as encouragement. The better you write, the more we can share it with our friends and the rest of the world. I am one of your faithful readers and grateful that you dedicate a big part of your life to shine a light on the darkness in this world.
Thank you so much for taking the time to share such detailed and constructive feedback. I truly appreciate the guidance, and I will be sure to implement these improvements in my future work.
There’s not enough serious work on this topic. If you cite your sources, I can cite you.
I would also like to see your sources as my husband disputed several things I read him from your article.
Please cite who you are quotig, where their expertise is derived, and any printed, video, or audio source material for the information. Thank you
In the seventies I remember how the biker gangs would recruit young girls. Love bomb them, then proceeded right to trauma bonding them. In no time these girls would do anything. Tattoo themselves with property of so and so. These girls were proud of their servitude.
Crimes against humanity by the CIA again.